"dear short dickle dorn."

this blog is dedicated to disgusting texts i have been receiving. there is a human out there in this world with the most deranged mind. i don't know how he is still alive. his specialty is drawing cats and smokin cigs. but read the texts at the end of this blog. you may laugh.

this level was redic.
this took me 6 minutes. fn heat.
will and trevor got a place. they have a hot tub. i plan on hot tubbing everyday. 
there was a rail jam on saturday night. kids wur flying. we chilled. 
the mountain has been getting "inversion" weather? its where the top of the mountain is warmer than the bottom. shredding has be insane. +7 yesterday. +10 today. winnipeg is apparently getting brutal weather. must be cause my handsomeness isn't there. so it got colder?. that actually makes sense.
phil snowboards till death for life till death. we lost him today for like 20 minutes. i already had dibs on his sled. is that bad karma.
this is my bad karma story. yesterday i flew off this cat track. k. so this ski patrol comes up to me at the bottom. taps my shoulder. is like slow it down out there. so im like k. but on the way up i was making fun of him. today. i fly off a different cat track. mid air i see my phone fly out of my pocket. still mid air i try grabbing it. no chance. end up ripping my ear phone out of my ear. and its sliding so fast down the hill. as me and brent are following it. somehow i pass it. flick it with my board. anyway. it only vibrates now. 
apparently because im 22. my bones do not absord calcium. "anica". i have been hammering away at cheese wiz lately. im on my second jar. that has to be good calcium. and phil flew into me and ripped my pants and chipped my brace. he'll be reading this. get me a 6 pack and we'll call it even. bro.
dave and tessa wur kind enough to give us there old tv stand. i actually carried it to the car. we get it home and this what was under it. my fingers wur obv. close to those webs carrying it to my car. we mega cleaned the trailer. and i did "laundry".  

k. so this is where i will post my received texts word by word. 

A)"Jingle jingle bangle jangle I got a fresh pair of panties to rangle up in a tangle. A poo turn named stevie Stevenson poped in to say hi and what's up to the toilet bowl of love."

B)"aka wipe well"

C)"I heard if you squeeze you dick hole while peeing you can get pregnant. So i did it and peeed all over my pantaloonys."

D)"i just pooed lettuce"

E)"i ate a poo log for din din. With Tabascy"

F)"A 2 dollar trannie is my gf. we sare herpes."

these are disgusting! i can't believe it. some poeple have no maturity. the level is getting extremely low with this individual. but. i need to make food. and watch movies. and then snowboard. love